Living Out Your Values: Ineffective Moral High-Ground or Powerful Secret Weapon?

In 2018, British ultra-athlete Ross Edgely set out to do something ambitious. He wanted to swim around Great Britain.

Everyone said it couldn’t be done and he would die in his attempt.  

David Marquet was a submarine captain who wanted to improve morale and performance on his vessel by experimenting with a more collaborative leadership style. 

Everyone said it was a folly that would erode his authority. 

Common wisdom, and Sunday School verses, say that you should “do the right thing”. But what about when the right thing isn’t clear? What about when the experts disagree with you? 

I’ve been in that place. People I worked with and books I’ve read said my leadership style was “wrong.” I figured my gut must be misguided if it was directing me differently. I wanted to be a good leader, so I pushed my ideas aside and did things their way.

At least I did, until I couldn’t take it anymore. I needed to find answers for myself. When it seems that the world is against you, is living out your values an ideal that leads to poor results, or is there a quiet strength that others can’t understand?

The Effect on Others 

If Ross Edgely wanted to do the impossible, he needed a team of equally ambitious people to help him. He trained with ultramarathoners, physiotherapists, nutritionists, weightlifters, psychologists, and open-water swimmers at the top of their craft. Sometimes, he asked about concepts like nutrition, sometimes he practiced specific skills, and other times, it was more like going for a run with a buddy to watch and learn how they thought, moved, ate, and recovered. 

As Edgely embodied the actions and mindset of the experts he trained with, he levelled up his own ability and attracted people who were equally keen to do ambitious things. One of those people was a sailor who became the captain on Edgely’s support boat. 

Then, with little fanfare - because no one thought he could succeed - Edgely dove from a pier in the South of England and started swimming. For months on end, he swam 12 hours a day, shot across shipping lanes, raced storms to reach safe harbours and swam through swarms of jellyfish. Edgely and his crew teamed up because of a desire to do something unthinkable. On the tough days - when his wet suit was chaffing, they were sleep-deprived or dreading another meal at sea - they encouraged, problem-solved and kept each other focused on that goal.

After 157 days, Ross Edgely completed the first swim around Great Britain without ever setting foot on land. He’ll be the first to tell you how important a team of passionate people was to achieving his dream. 

I believe that we all have an internal radar that helps us determine someone’s integrity. When they live out their values, we are attracted and influenced by their ideas but when they profess values that are different from how they act, something seems off and we put up guards. 

At one hotel, it felt like I could never get the team to give the level of service that I wanted to do. I was also busy and stressed and noticed that there were many times I didn’t treat guests with the level of intention I wanted to. While at a different location, a team member gave me one of the greatest compliments of my life: “Duncan poops guests service”. He meant that great service was such a part of who I was that it flowed out of me in every way. And there, it seemed that everyone naturally provided great service. I never stopped preaching about great service, but how I acted it out affected how my teams responded to my ideas. 

The Effect on the Company

David Marquet needed to turn things around. He was given command of a submarine he knew nothing about, and it was the worst in the fleet. 

As many military cultures are, this vessel was organized in a very top-down structure. Even in the control room, the crew would wait to be told to do something or “request permission to…” before taking action. Marquet honed in on this and acted firm, decisive, and in control. But he couldn’t see everything, know everything, and be an expert making the calls for every situation all the time. 

In one situation, he essentially commanded the crew to put the submarine in fourth gear when it only had three gears. This showed him that his values and leadership style needed to change. His crew knew the vessel better than he did, so he needed to lead them instead of directing them. 

He started out small and asked his crew as situations came up how they thought things should be done. Eventually, his senior officers noticed the collaborative approach and followed suit. They allowed crew members who were experts at their jobs to act like experts instead of waiting for commands from someone who didn’t know the job as they did. 

As Marquet lived out his values of intent-based leadership, others got on board and they worked together to change how they operated the submarine. Eventually, they achieved the highest retention and operational standing in the Navy. Just because one leader was brave enough to follow his intuition and change how things were done. 

I always want to do a great job and often seek feedback to improve or just to reassure myself that I am doing enough. At one seasonal business, I was amazed that no feedback was given until the seasonal performance reviews. 

At the end of the season, while I conducted the reviews, my perspective (and convictions) changed. So many of the staff members had great ideas to improve things! It made me sad that I hadn’t heard these ideas earlier. Other times, I wished that I had taken time to coach a staff member earlier so they could learn and adjust instead of muddling through only doing a mediocre job. The feedback structure prevented me and my team from improving at all. 

So, in the next season, I changed up the process. One month after starting, we had an evaluation where both the leaders and team members could talk. The team got some quick feedback to know how to adjust their performance and I got ideas to improve my own leadership and operation that I could work on throughout the season. When I started leading how I wanted to, it forced me to change how we did things, which improved what we did.  

The Effect on You

Despite my successes, I have always felt underqualified. When I was 22, I was trusted to launch an all-inclusive program at a new hotel. Glowing reviews in Canadian Geographic, Forbes, and other travel sites praised our service, views, and unique experience. In our first year, we climbed from zero to the top ten and by our second year were second on travel review sites. Then, when I was 25, I became second in command at a larger historic hotel and needed to look after our staff housing, two restaurants, a retail store, room cleaning, bell service and more. Despite needing to learn a whole new operation in that first year, we raised our guest satisfaction by about 50% and our location outperformed the company average in team satisfaction. 

But it wasn’t enough. I always felt like I should have done more. I copied other leaders so no one would know I didn’t have formal training. To prove how valuable I was, I set out to do more than anyone else, often working 12-16 hour days. I fought anxiety daily and waited for everyone to discover what an imposter I was. 

Over time, I realized that despite my youth, lack of formal schooling or any other factor, I was qualified for the job. I did an outstanding job because of my effort, creativity and perspective. Steadily, I grew more sure of myself and began leading how I wanted. 

Rather than worrying that my boss may think I was wasting time, I felt confident taking time to listen to a frustrated team member. Rather than doing what everyone else in the company was, I made changes to our evaluations. Rather than helping clean rooms to prove how expert I was, I spent time interviewing and hiring to ensure we were well-staffed for our busy seasons. 

We improved our service even more. This time, I also felt proud about my performance. No more “coulda/shoulda”. It was enough. The anxiety that had plagued me for years eased up. The imposter syndrome I struggled with disappeared. Several team members said that it was my attention that kept them going when it was hard and that I had shaped how they see service. 

I went from being a leader in name, always worried about what I thought others would think, to being a real leader and embodying my values in a way that changed lives. And boy, did it feel good! 

Taking a Brave Step

But living out my values didn’t just feel good; it worked! Ross Edgley showed how living out our values builds momentum from a like-minded team. I’ve seen how living authenticity makes you a natural leader rather than forcing your influence on others. David Marquet shows how evaluating your ideas and living out your core values can improve a culture and its metrics. My own experience backs this up. When I was able to bring all parts of myself together, I created momentum inside of me. 

Sometimes, I think we need to be brave enough to live out what feels right for us. No one else’s convictions will ever truly feel right for you because you have unique life experiences, goals and motivations. You need to live those out to have a full impact. 

What about you? Have you ever had a perspective but dismissed it because it didn’t fit with other popular thoughts? Have you settled because “that’s not how things are done”? 

So how can you take a brave step to live out your values?